The Covenant

Ok so I'm just going to get this little rant out of my system.. RE: the film The Covenant, don't watch it, NOT EVER!

.. unless you are the kind of girl who is drawn to a film purely on the basis that some of the male cast members are quote unquote 'cute'.

I sat down in front of the TV, dvd case in hand, ready for a few supernatural thrills of an evening but alas it was not to be!

After sitting through a very painful hour and a half (which I'll never see again and wish instead that I had used the time more wisely.. perhaps to have some route canal surgery or clean my kitchen floor - something that currently lookes a mite more scary than this film) I was just left with an interesting feeling.. it was a combination of complete indifference to the characters portrayed, mixed with a little bit of boredom and more than both of these a burning RAGE.

Because, as I sat willing the dodgy plot premise ('cute', male witches coming into certain 'powers' upon turning eighteen) and special effects along I was struck by the complete absence of any strong female characters. In fact in the entire film there are only three women (apart from the scantily clad ones shown en-masse in background shots and at frat parties.)

Now I know that when I selected this fine dvd from the vast selection offered up by my local Asda the £5.00 special offer should have been a giveaway. But I'm a huge fan of teen based horror (it's the only kind I can comfortably sit through without wrecking my pants) like The Craft so I thought The Covenant might be entertaining, or if not at least amusing. But the rage began around the time that the first lead girl was despatched as a plot devise (bitten by hundreds of spiders - nice!) and the second was set up to be something of note but then just became our damsel in distress.

After forty five minutes of watching mildly attractive boys making cars fly and 'zapping' each other in alley ways I was intriguided by Sarah (Laura Ramsey) who was the new girl in town, with a crush on lead boy Caleb (Steven Strait) and I secretly hoped was imbued with some kind of awesome power that would then save the day.

As the boys struggled with one another, fighting for ultimate power (or something) Sarah was used as a trap floating ethereally in a barn just yards from danger. I moved closer to my TV screen thinking with all my might "Come on Sarah.. Come on!" willing her to be something cool, something empowering, anything interesting other than token damsel. As things wore on to the final fight scene (more zapping) I was in disbelief at both the awfulness of the film and the complete lack of any female power within it. When the final credits rolled I sat defeated looking at the dvd case as if for answers - Sarah had been (predictably) rescued by good witch Caleb and they were on to their way to a happy ever after.. which probably involved more female nudity and frat parties.

I mean come on! Haven't we progressed beyond this kind of drivel by now? Is it just me who wants to see a spunky female character thrown into the mix who does some magic of her own? If she could have wiped out the entire male cast it would have at least been entertaining!
Aside from Sarah the only other women presented were Caleb's mother, an alcoholic and therefore self-indulgent and ineffective and 'spider-bite' girl, who it seems was primarily despatched because she was kind of a slut. interesting.

So there we go, lesson learned. Next time a pseudo supernatural teen horror beckons me from the bargain bin I'll just keep walking. Maybe I'll go home and re-watch The Craft instead.

You can read my review of The Craft here:
http://www.cutoutandkeep.net/snippets/issue7/spooky_movie

Hello World!

Wow ok, here goes for my first blog entry EVER..

Have to say I'm a little nervous about this new techie medium, I'm the kind of gal that hasn't really moved much with the times. I prefer my old beaten-up Sony walkman over those fangled ipods you hear so much about and sadly my mobile phone can't quite cope with pictures. But, since I consider myself to be a writer I thought a blog would be the next logical step on from my ramblings on myspace and such!

Things I am currently in love with/obsessed to the point of some kind of borderline mental illness:

Comic Books

* Artwork by FSc - Every time I see one of her phenomenal illustrations the heart breaking beauty and elegance they evoke takes my breath away. She recently parted ways with Serena Valentino's Nightmare and Fairy Tales series in favour of her own projects and I really hope she continues to gain exposure over here in the UK because she is so incredibly talented!

http://www.fscwasteland.com/

* Julie Doucet - I recently discovered 'My New York Diary' which is an illustrated diary of Julie's experiences in NY over the course of one year. The attention to details is mind-blowing and the stories she weaves are a wonderful combination of funny/sad as she struggles to 'make it' as a comic book artist and not be swept away in the surreal nightmare of drugs, alcohol and poverty she finds herself immersed in.

http://www.drawnandquarterly.com/artStudio.php?artist=a3dff7dd52e65a

Tim Burton

I've always been a big Burton Fan but lately I'm having a little Burton renaissance having finally purchased a copy of The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy and I just can't stop looking at it! I also went to a BFI talk recently all about his films and animations and I left feeling really inspired. His films inhabit a world that I not only recognise but would quite happily live in.

I recently gave The Nightmare before Christmas another viewing (being as it is the festive season and all) and did a little write up for a website I contribute to, called 'Cut out and Keep'. You can read it here:

http://www.cutoutandkeep.net/snippets/issue9/nightmare_before_christmas

Costa Cinnamon Latte

Oh my god they are so damned good and festive too! If only I could make them at home... sigh!

mmmmm yum!

Russian Dolls

Have just started my collection (hoping for another this christmas) and then I will have a small army of beautiful dolls! muah ha haaa! I particularly like these: